On Loneliness And Traveling Alone

The most important relationship in your life is the relationship you have with yourself. Because no matter what happens, you will always be with yourself.” – Diane Von Furstenberg

Do you avoid traveling alone because you think you will feel lonely? Well, it’s true; sometimes, when you travel alone, you might feel lonely. If you put yourself in situations to meet lots of people, feeling lonely will not happen often. However, it might still happen occasionally.

So what?

It’s no different from that fact that you will sometimes feel lonely when you are in a crowded room. Or that you will sometimes feel lonely even when you are in a relationship; perhaps your partner is gone for a weekend, or perhaps you feel disconnected from them. At any time in life, you can still feel lonely! Because this can’t be avoided, the only way to deal with it is to go into it. Spend time alone. You might find out it’s not so bad, and you will become comfortable with it. People have a tendency to avoid being alone, and become driven at all times by desperate compulsions to avoid being alone with themselves. But if you are not afraid of being alone, you can be more careful about the people you chose to surround yourself with, and the places you chose to be.

And it’s not just that you can feel lonely at anytime in life, there are other things, too! Sometimes in a relationship you feel happy and loving, sometimes you feel annoyed. Sometimes you will feel inspired by your career or school or artistic expression or life overall, sometimes you will feel bored and unmotivated. That’s just part of being human. Travel is such an amazing experience. It is life-changing, it is freeing and adventurous. So it is not a big deal that the packing and moving can occasionally become tiring and tedious, just as long planes, trains and automobile rides can be. It’s all just part of life, and it all arises and passes. When I can remember to, when I feel down, I think, “That’s ok. Later it will be different.” When I feel happy and joyful, I try to notice that and appreciate it, and think, “How wonderful this feels. Later it will be different, and that’s ok.”

So fear of loneliness is not a good reason to avoid traveling alone. Loneliness may happen, but later it will be different!

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